Thursday, June 25, 2009

See you next Wednesday (actually, Thursday)...

Whooo,...damn that Brendan (Fontana's barkeep.) Not that I don't usually blog a little tipsy, just tonight I was on a roll and he noticed. Easy, killer!

Ok, so, Michael Jackson died today. Who saw THAT one coming?? Not me. We don't really know a lot about this guy, ironically. I mean, he IS/WAS one of the biggest stars ever. I remember, in my WAY younger days, seeing the making of 'Thriller' (mostly because John Landis directed, who is a baddass) and trying to learn the dance.

I sucked. Michael Peters is a sadist. (10 pts if you know who he is, I do and guess what? I am as straight as they come, just married to a dancer for 7 years and I pay attention.)

But, I'm honestly shocked this hasn't happend before. Most huge pop stars die by 27, but no, no. Mike had something to live for. Be it the kids, his fame, or that very last tour he was preping for. That tour, BTW, of the U.K. anyway, was already sold out weeks, maybe months ago.

He WAS a talented performer. "Electrifying!" to quote Little Richard about Mike's already dead former Father-in-law. (To soon?)

AND he could AFFORD to drag along all the baggage from his kidhood and subsequent stardom. And, it was legion. I'm not tearing him down. I know those kids had a harder life than most. And child performers in general, regardless of fame do. Those of you who know me, know that I can speak from experience on THAT one. No judgement here, BTW. Trust me.

So, anyway, I salute you sir. AND to put the age old flyover-that-guy-HAS-to-be-gay to bed, I know you had a tough time of it and I sympathize. It's hard to discern I know( DId you know that MJ wrote that Diana Ross hit 'Muscles'?... Eh, so what,..Maybe he was just projecting a wish?)

There are reasons for his quirks and most of us have always known it, (including, I suspect, some judges. Someone had to say it..)

Rest in peace, be that ultimate Simon Cowell in the sky, but follow up on it.
We're going to hell in a handbasket in every way, and since you were so important; when you have that coveted meeting with the almighty, ask him if we can go back to the early 80's and start all over as far as direction in pop goes. Maybe you, at this point, after all of life's questions have been answered, can save us from Katy Perry. Someone has to..

NEXT WEEK, THE FIRST ROUND OF THE FIRST ANNUAL SMARTASS'S BADASS ROCK AND ROLL FACT HEADSPILL! What is that you may ask? We are having a tournament, it's a three week affair. Your team (up to 10!) must be there every week to win! Prizes TBA, but we promise they will be worth it! Be there next week for qualify!

THE WINNERS TONIGHT WERE:

1ST PLACE: THE NEW ORIGINALS- 580pts (Also, winners of the two shot rounds!)

2ND PLACE- THE CHERRY FLAVOURED SCHMOOS- 530PTS

3RD PLACE- ELEVEN (Or, we go too)- 520PTS

Congrats all! Fun night,...maybe to fun for me, sorry, try to stay more focused next time!

Here's is my favorite Michael Jackson performance ever. We all will miss him, All cruel jokes aside, he was a master that no one will ever forget. A true rockstar. Some have said that Kurt was the last rockstar,...I think that's only because we thought Mike would last forever. I wish he had. RIP Michael Jackson, and Farrah Fawcett!

Friday, June 19, 2009

It's astounding,...time is fleeting..

Last night was a great night, pretty crowded. Hope everyone had a great night. I'm so damb happy we moved to Fontana's. It's been pretty awesome, I gotta say.

No big news on the show, still waiting a few people to sign off on some things and equipment, etc. But it's still going.

I'm not in a very wordy mood tonight, so I'm just gonna post the winners and hope for the best.

1ST PLACE- PETE! 650 PTS

2ND PLACE- YO BITCHES 530 PTS

3RD PLACE- TWO MAN ARMY OF DARKNESS 530 PTS (Tiebreakers)

Here's some of T.V. On The Radio's set from Bonnaroo! Enjoy!

Friday, June 12, 2009

Dude,...I have NO idea whats going on..

So, heresa deal, the score sheet for this weeks game is still in the office of Fontana's, (along with my tools for trivia because I had to dash out for the Fleetwood Mac show at MSG and they wouldn't have let me in that musical keep with anything remotely resembling recording equipment) therefore, in my drunken state I cannot remember the winners this week. I'll post 'em later.

Not that YOU care. I'd be shocked and amazed if anyone even read this blog, so instead, here is a brief review of said show, a funny pic of Phil Spectors hair and some funny commentaries.

THE REVIEW:

I got to the show late. I heard what I thought was piped in elevator music on the way in, (only because at this point The Mac IS elevator music as far as any of these brainless wonders who are our rock fans.)

It sounded like elevator music only because they sound SO perfect live. Walked right into a flawless mini-acoustic set by Buckingham and Nicks of "Landslide" and "Never Going Back Again", which was VERY dramatically performed by the Lynds'.

I WILL say though, his solo performances were the best and mostly emotional.

Great, but he never let you forget that he was the (most likley) highest paid member of that band at this time. OR not. Either way, he was more of an actor than musican thoughout the whole show. Stevie was,..well, Stevie, shawls, shadows, etc. I love me some Stevie, don't get me wrong, but after a second round at MSG on this "Hits" tour, you could tell they were just there for the paycheck. They even covered 'Stand Back' to the delight of the 500 Stevies who were there. The crowd was mostly 45+. Raised on an apathetic diet of 70's AOR, and maybe the last chance they would have gotten to see this band again.

All in all, seeing this band for the first, and I suspect the last time, I give them an 8 outta 10. That's saying something for a band of that stature.

Ok, here's a little funny:


Nice,...

Thursday, June 4, 2009

"You're no one in rock and roll until you've fought with me, or slept with Wynonna Ryder!"- Courtney Love..."OR, Michael Stipe!"-Todd Satterfield

I wonder of that included Kurt?? Probably not, there's no way that harpy would have allowed that lil' coupling. ALTHOUGH, word has it she tried to encourage Kurt to explore his cross-dressing fetish with one Michael Stipe. That's just what I heard, but from reliable snitches. But, hell, Mike Stipe has ALWAYS been a bit of a star-fucker in his own right. From Paul Westerberg to KRS-One to Thom Yorke. Most of these folks have worked with REM or are friends of theirs and it's no secret Mikes' gay.

I've questioned his intentions since that scene in 'Meeting People Is Easy' when after a trying tour schedule, a road weary Thom Yorke is protected from menacing, over-zealous security goons who didn't recognize the LEAD SINGER of the headlining band as he went up to the green room after his show. Stipe was there, all "HEY, he's the lead singer, BACK OFF!" protecting his lil' buddy Thom.

This is complete bullshit. Back off, Mike. YOU'RE outta line! The look on Yorke's face said it all. A mix of unease and apathy (a stretch for Yorke.)

Here's why:

Forget the fact that pre-Radiohead band, "On A Friday", had been touring Europe for years before even BECOMING Radiohead, (that was right around the time 'True Stories' came out,...hmmm?) OR that 'Creep' was a HUGE hit and the ensuing tour of the U.S. should have prepared Thom & Co. for what they could have expected, even after releasing ANOTHER huge album (The Bends) and touring the U.S. again.

After all that hype and hoopla, Big Daddy Stipe has to step in and defend Thom to security goons on a Grammy tour (O.K. Computer??)

I doubt it.

So after all that ranting, my point is (and I DO have one), Mike Stipe is a star-fucker,...almost. I'm know Thom is straight and married and had no interest in going all Bowie and Jagger with Mr.This-One-Goes-Out-To-The-One-I-Love. After all that dues earning on Thom's part, I'm SURE he was quite capable of defending his stardom/vanity. I mean, really, all he had to do was start dancing like he does onstage! Have you SEEN him thrashing around to "Idioteque" off 'Kid A" onstage? He could give any U.F.C. goon a run for his money just by grooving to his own bump!

KRS-One on the other hand? Oh,Stipe and he TOTALLY fucked....
(Disclaimer: Not really, KRS would have me shot. You know how the hippity-hop community hates snitches.)

Tonight's big winners were:

1ST PLACE: TWO MAN ARMY OF DARKNESS-540 PTS

2ND PLACE: DISASTER UNR.-530 PTS

3RD PLACE: ELEVEN-520 PTS

Thats right ladies and germs, all seperated by 10 pts a piece. Well done, guys.

Here's proof of what I was talking about before..

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Well,....

...not a 'phenomenal' turn-out tonight (regardless of my pleadings off Facebook) but good enough to garner a 'pilot'. That means NBC is interested, they will spend a bit of money based on they're ideas of what the show should be, and decide from there. We'll see. They were very nice and fun and enthusiastic. Means a lot and I feel satisfied (unlike Westerberg) that the night was a success.

That mean come next week to get the pure stuff, (lookin' at YOU Jersey!) because we may be made safe for network when you see us en masse. And it includes the Jersey market, so THERE all you high school peeps who beat me up/shit on me/didn't have respect because i didn't attend reunions,....Oh,...sorry,

That means no cussing and much less snarky. OR not,...but I digress...I'm told via email, that we will finaly have a story about us in AMNY tomorrow. So, if you are heading to the subway in the morning, (something I RARELY do anymore) pick up a copy and let me know if they are on the level or not!

The winners tonight were:

1ST PLACE- The CHERRY FLAVOURED SCHMOO'S (Surprise there...)

2ND PLACE- TEAM ANVIL ( The team from NBC, and they won it FAIR AND SQUARE!)

3RD PLACE- "I'M A DOCTOR, JIM!"

Ok, here's an awesome appearance of an awesome band on the JOAN RIVER'S show from '87!! Check it out!

BTW, if you read this blog, give a shout out so I can gauge the awesome peeps who frequent this!!

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Now playing Big Time by Peter Gabriel

So, I've been re-reading "Psychotic Reactions and Carburetor Dung" which is a collection of album reviews and stories about rock and roll. It's just so great and so smartly written. The guy makes no bones about the fact that he wrote on drugs, and it reads like that, but in a very intelligent way.

Phillip Seymour Hoffman played him briefly in 'Almost Famous'. He told a young William Miller, "You know I used to take speed,...a little cough syrup, and just stay up all night writing, just to fucking write."

Thats how it reads too.

I highly recommend it. (Barnes and Noble usually has a copy laying around.) GO GET IT! I suggest starting with the story of The Clash, then move on to the re-telling of the song Maggie May. Both are side splitting.

Tomorrows a BIG day for the game. I can't say too much because I don't want to jinx it, but all will be explained next entry. I swear. Just send me some extra good vibes and luck!

THE WINNERS TONIGHT WERE:

1ST PLACE- WE LOVE PIZZA-500 PTS (Way to go guys, your first win!)

2ND PLACE- TWO MAN ARMY OF DARKNESS

3RD PLACE- THE STUFF (Alex Tween of The Forms, my favorite band, and Jen Carlson of Gothamist.com, my favorite local news blog)

Here's a clip of a very underrated band from the 80's that is dear to my heart performing a kick ass hit of theirs live.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Wow, let's get behind this green thing!

Tonight was stellar! We had a shit-ton of new first timers who really enjoyed the game and that was cool. We like that energy. High scorers too! Almost everybody wins!

Some SMARTASS news, and there is some..

1. We will be in AM NY on MAY 29th. That's what I was told. Maybe the most read newspaper of strap-hangers in NYC.

2. Fingers crossed, I was contacted by a producer of NY Non-Stop, an N.B.C. owned local TV news station, and we were asked if we wanted to do a piece for the channel. That means a 2 minute (or so) spot that will run for a day, all day. This is very cool. TV exposure is a great thing, even for cable....(Did I say that out loud?) No, really, I'm way happy about it and can't wait!

Here are the winners tonight:

1. TWO MAN ARMY OF TWILIGHT-410 PTS

2. THE SOLO SCHMOO-380 PTS

3. HAIRBO-360 PTS

I asked a few questions about Van Halen this week (did you know it was Davd Lee Roth who thought they should name the band 'Van Halen'?) so here is a brief history of the band in it's early stages. Pay attention.